thay no da wae!
by Phantaum
Summary: All things die in the end, it is simply a rule of life. However, for the tribes of Uganda, death is only another doorway to travel through to find their way, and to find their queen. Too bad Jack left the Ghost Portal open again.
1. mastas nos da wae!

Obligatory disclaimer. I own nothing. Let's get onto the sequel of the mess!

* * *

Amity Park. A peaceful little town just south of FaZe Clan Land and the largest importer of weed in the entire world. Not a lot of notable things happen in this sprawling city; only some minor disturbances caused by rogue ghosts and memes. Or both. At the same time. As the same thing.

This was a reality the Mayor of Amity Park, Vlad Masters was living with when the report was dropped onto his desk. He had taken a hit from his doobie only moments prior, and choked on the smoke when the folder was thrown onto the desk by his secretary. He gave her a venomous glare, which caused her to go running from the room.

He sighed as he sat up in his seat. "Oh I wonder what these idiots need now," he scorned, as he put his joint out. He decided it would be best to relight it later, when he wasn't as busy.

He opened the manila folder that was presented before him and analyzed the contents. "A report from Jack and Maddie? Odd…" He rubbed his beard as he looked over the statistics presented. Eventually, he grew tired of all of the numbers and moved them aside.

Upon doing so, he was presented by a ghastly sight, which is saying something since he is one of the most powerful ghosts in the Ghost Zone. There, presented to him was a red, deformed, _thing_. It was not wearing much besides a pair of white gloves with pronounced knuckles a a pair of red and yellow shoes. Around the photos were notes from Maddie, judging from the hand-writing.

"Do you know the way?" Vlad repeated to himself. He looked over the other photos of the creature, with most of the showing it with its mouth open, or with a screwed face. "How odd…"

Before he could look at the pictures further, he was interrupted by the Air Horn remix of MEGALOVANIA going off. His hand to his phone quickly, and put it up to his ear. "This had better be important, I am busy."

"Some… things are here to visit you, Mr. Masters," came the voice of his secretary.

He sighed aloud. "I told you that no one is to visit me today, Cheryl," He stated irritably, "tell whomever they are that they need to leave."

"I have tried that many times, but they continue to pester me."

"I don't care, just get rid of them." Vlad hung up the phone and leaned back in his chair. The day was going so well up until this point. He was starting to regret putting his blunt out right about now.

Suddenly, he heard his secretary scream, followed by a thump against his office doors. "You ar not da kween!" something yells with a mock African accent, something that is very out of place in the US, let alone Amity Park.

Vlad stands up from behind his desk and moves to the door with a heavy scowl on his face. Whatever it was that decided to disturb him today would regret it.

Before he could even reach the doors, they shot open, slamming against the wall and destroying the busts of Vlad that were flanking the doors. Standing there in the doorway was the very thing Vlad saw in the pictures. He frowned at the intruding creatures. "State your business, and get out before I force you out," he declared.

The creatures looked amongst themselves for a moment, before the one in front took a step forward. It screwed its face, as if it were thinking, before its jaws flew open to an impossible size. "DO U NO DA WAE!?" it yelled out.

Vlad winced at the volume it asked its question at. He cleared one of his ears out with his pinkie and looked at it. "What?"

"DO U NO DA WAE?" It repeated. The others around it also screwed up they're faces.

Vlad looked at the creatures confused, not fully understanding what was going on. "What way? What are you things talking about?"

However, this proved to not be the response they were looking for, as they all screwed up their faces, and glared at him. Then, an ungodly loud wave of screeching hit Vlad, sending him flying backwards, into his desk, knocking it over and making a mess of his office.

He climbed out of the mess of paper, mary jane, and other important things that were scattered about by the screeching and glared at the group of creatures that were filing into his office. All of them were repeating "do you no da wae" loudly, and showed no signs of stopping. Vlad glared at the group, and- using his powers to project his voice- yelled, "SILENCE!"

This made them all stop where they were, many of them with their mouths still open, and others mid-step, causing them to fall forwards onto the ground. They all stared at Vlad as he dusted off his ornate suit, and adjusted his tie.

He moved his attention from himself and onto the group, who hadn't moved an inch since he yelled. "Right then," he started, smirking, "if you want to know the way so bad, let me show it to you."

He stood tall, and summoned his ghost powers to the surface. The ever-familiar transformation rings appeared around his waist, and moved in opposite directions across his body, turning his suit white, and his skin a dead blue color. His grey hair turned black, and slicked into a dangerous, two-point crown. His eyes turned red, and he smiled broadly, revealing his elongated canines to the group of offending creatures. To complete his transformation, he levitated a dropped blunt from off of the velvet carpet, and lit it with an ecto-blast, taking a hit and blowing the smoke out in a fine-line.

The creatures gazed upon the now transformed Vlad Master, now Plasmius, in awe. But shortly, the leader scrunched its face once more, before shouting, "HE DOS NOT NO DA WAE!" The rest of the group chanted after the leader, and started approaching Plasmius.

Vlad floated away from the group as they neared, causing they to start jumping at him like fleas. "Do you know who you are messing with, you foul abominations! I am Vlad Masters!"

At this proclamation, they stopped and stared up at him, Eventually, one shouted. "HE WISHES TO HARM DA KWEEN! UGANDAN WARRIORS UNITE!" With this command, the Ugandan Warriors tied green headbands around their heads, and pulled out crude looking, primitive spears. They all pulled their arms back, ready to throw.

Vlad, realizing what was gonna happen, dodged out of the way. He only barely managed to avoid being impaled on the wall behind him. He realized that arguing with these creatures was pointless, and fired an ecto-blast at the group, causing a group of them to be disintegrated. Vlad followed this up with a barrage of blasts, which resulted in the Warriors's group to shrink dramatically. Vlad took another hit on his blunt in satisfaction.

The remaining group's eyes shrunk. They looked at each other in a silent conversation before one blurted out, "RUN AWAY!"

Vlad smiled triumphantly as they ran away from him. "That will teach you things about what happens if you challenge Vlad Masters. However, something they said still tickled at his mind. It was something about "harming the queen?" He shrugged it off, as it probably wasn't important, considering how weak those things were.

So, he changed forms and floated down to the ground, satisfied with his work for the day. He stepped towards his flipped desk and turned it, and the chair upright with little issue and sat down and relaxed.

Finally, some peace and quiet.

* * *

Hello readers. I have created a sequel to the mess of a story I wrote quite a few years ago called "fantoms gota go fahst". This time we're resurrecting yet another dead meme. Do not worry, this is only part one of this mess. I meant for it to be the only part, but there is a few more things I want to do before I finish this up. Of course, you will have to wait and see what I have planned.

Also, please forgive my grammatical errors. I can't be bother to proof-read a half-baked craicfic.

Chao!


	2. fantaum nos da wae!

Dany Funten was not having a good day.

First he got to school late, causing Mr. Lancer to mark down his already abysmal homework grade, then there was the ghost attack by "The Ghost Zone's Greatest Hunter" Skulker, which resulted in him having to miss a test in Math. Afterwards, his parents chased him out of his home when he emptied the thermos, causing him to drop it and release all the captured specters. On top of that was the ghosts that escaped the Ghost Zone due to his dad leaving the Funten Pothole open. He wasn't going to admit it to anyone (but Sam, maybe Tucker), but he cried for at least 2 minutes.

"I hate my life," he muttered to himself, while trying to hide his limp and tears. He was racing to his second to last class of the day. Even though he missed a lot of school, he wasn't a truant of his own volition. He used to be a really good student, with mostly B+'s but with these new ghost powers, he's been stuck balancing his rank on CoD with school and ghosts. Hee would have took a hit off of his joint to help relieve the pain and clear his head, but the state said that "school is a drug-free zone". Stupid Old People, thinking weed inhibits learning.

Since he wasn't paying attention to where he was going, he tripped on something that was in the hall. He stumbled and landed on his stomach. He laid on the floor and sighed in dismay. " _Stupid clumsy Funten"_. He pushed himself off of the ground and flipped over, so he could look at what he tripped on. What he saw there surprised him.

He was expecting to see Dash standing there with a smirk on his face, and a joint in his mouth, but instead he saw what looked like a red blob laying off-center in the hall. It was deformed, with thin, spaghetti like arms and legs. At the end of it's spindly arms were white gloves with pronounced knuckles, and on the ends of its legs were green, oversized shoes.

Dany's ghost sense went off as the thing hopped off of the ground, faced Dany and gave him a Thousand-Yard Stare. It looked like it was contemplating all meaning in the universe, and life, trying to solve the greatest questions the brightest mind have ever encountered.

Dany pushed himself off of the ground and approached it. "Heya, what are you?" he asked it.

The question broke it out of its contemplations just before it could answer the question to the meaning of life, all things, and the universe. The thing directed its attention onto Dany and screwed up it's face. It looked like it was constipated and was trying to poop.

Dany raised an eyebrow at the creature, baffled by its odd behavior. Before he could question it, the thing yelled out "DO U NO DA WAE!?" its jaw unhinging to open its mouth wide open. It was so loud that Dany had to cover his ears from the abhorrent sound that was assaulting them.

When he was certain it was safe to do so, Dany uncovered his ears and scowled at the offending creature he was certain was a ghost. It had the odd shape, let off an ecto-signature, and had the unnatural powers all indicative of a ghost. It was very likely that this thing was only here to cause chaos as well, judging from how loud it was.

So, Dany sighed as he had to, once again, fight with another supernatural enemy during school. He focused on his ghostly core, and allowed it to come to the surface and manifest itself. This caused the transformation from loser Dany Funten, to his quickscoper other half, Danny Fantaum; the half he gained when he teleported bread on accident a year ago.

"Alright guy, it's time to take you back to the Ghost Zone," Dany said in his squeaker voice as he pulled out the Thermos.

The weird creature crossed its eyes at Dany and stuck its tongue out. "U no da kween?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Da KWEEN of UGANDA!" It exclaimed again with a hop.

"What, who's that?"

The creature screwed its face before visibly deflating, a lot like a balloon would, and collapsed onto the floor. It seemed sad.

Dany simply rolled his eyes at the thing and shrugged. He had no clue what this thing was or what it who it was looking for, but he was losing his patience for these shenanigans. So, he uncapped the Thermos and sucked the creature up before it could react. With a sigh, Dany changed back into his human form and put the Thermos back into his bag.

"Maybe I can still catch the last ten minutes of class," he muttered to himself, before running off to his class.

* * *

Heya, sorry that not only is this chapter short, but it took so long to write. I've been really tired recently and typing this story in particular doesn't seem very appealing since it's one of those things you do when you're feeling really good and energized. The nature of this story plays off of chaos, which I am not short on when I'm actually awake. One chapter left, and they will find their "kween" eventually.

~Chao


	3. thay no da wae

Maddie was nearly there! All of the previous work was culminating to this very moment. All the charred marks on the walls and floors, the damaged furniture, and burnt jumpsuits would be worth this innovation in ghost hunting technology! She and her husband, Jack had poured all their energy into this ghost hunting device, and they were about to see the fruits of their labor.

"Can you hand me the Ecto-Filter, honey?" Maddie asked Jack from over her shoulder, busy focusing on the round, green, glowing device on the table in front of her.

The large man in the orange jumpsuit looked up from the papers he was reading. "Right away Mads!" He stood from the desk he was sat at, grabbed the nozzle of a vacuum looking device, and gave it to Maddie. She then put the nozzle of the device into the open top of the round orb, and pulled the trigger, filling it with a green ooze. She handed the nozzle of the device back to Jack, then place a lid on the orb. She secured it down with a carefully applied amount of pressure, clicking it into place.

She sat back in her seat and wiped her forehead with a sigh of relief. "Now, we need to let it sit for five minutes, and the Fenton Ghost-nade will be ready."

Jack smiled wide and clapped his hands together. "And in five minutes we can give those spooky spectres something to fear!" He threw his first into the air to accentuate his point.

Maddie simply rolled her eyes with a smile. "Indeed honey. I think we should celebrate."

"Will there be fudge?"

"Yes, just let me make sure this doesn't have any slow acting reaction." She said, keeping an eye on the potential bomb on her desk.

Jack giggled like a school child and turned around. "I'll meet you upstairs Mads! I'm gonna go get the stuff ready for you!" He then ran up stairs and out of the lab. Maddie sighed. She loved her husband, but sometimes he could be a bit much. She grabbed a clipboard from on the desk nearby, and started reading over her notes on the new gadget.

Though, before she could actually get started reading, she felt something tug on her jumpsuit legging. She jumped out of her seat immediately, notes forgotten. She landed in a combat pose, reading to defend herself from her attacker. On landing, she saw that there was no one there.

"What?" she asked herself. What pulled her leg?"

"Do u no da wae?" something asked. Maddie looked down towards the ground, and saw a group of creatures standing there, looking up at her with dumb-eyes and skewed mouths.

" _Oh, it's these things…"_ Maddie thought to herself. She and Jack had encountered these things once before. These "Warriors of Uganda" came through the portal once before due to them needing to leave the portal open to collect energy. They fought the ecto-creatures off when they initially came through. They sent information about the weird creatures to the mayor to warn him of them, but he'd yet to respond.

"Do u no da wae?" it asked again. These stupid things and insisting about knowing the way. Maddie was planning on kicking this thing to get rid of it quickly (they're extremely frail, from what her and Jack found) but, she looked around and saw that the once empty lab was filled with the things. They were everywhere, from on desks and table, to hanging on lights.

Maddie was speechless, the things were all looking at her intently, waiting for her to do something. She got a wonderful idea in her head. She could test the newly created Fenton Ghost-Nade on this group of monsters. Afterall, if her studies were right, it could easily-

"HEY MADS! WHAT'S TAKING SO LONG?" Jack called as he walked down the stairs. This caused the attention of all the Warriors to change to Jack, who was now at the bottom of the steps. He stopped there, and stared at awe at all of the creatures. He then noticed Maddie at her desk, completely surrounded by the things. So he did the first thing that came to mind.

"I'll save ya Maddie!" he yelled out, pulling out a Fenton Ghostray and jumping into the hoard. They took this as a threat and all started shrieking. By the time Jack landed again, all of the Warriors had launched themselves at him. He had no time to react before he was consumed by the onslaught.

For her part, Maddie could only sigh. At least now she had a chance to throw the grenade. Since it had it's time to rest, the explosive should be mostly harmless to humans, so Jack should suffer little more than a messy jumpsuit and ringing ears.

She grabbed the bomb off of the table and depressed the button on the top of it, arming it. She then casually lobbed it into the middle of the group, where it detonated on impact with the first thing it hit. The resulting blast annihilated all of the miniature monstrosities, leaving only a beaten and bloodied Jack on the floor.

Maddie dashed to the open Ghost Portal and slammed the big red button, causing the doors to crash shut. She then ran over to her husband, who was slowly picking himself up off of the ground. She kneeled down to him and gave him a hand in standing up, and helping him keep his balance.

"Thank you honey," he said, wobbling as they walked over to the medical closest they leave in the lab for emergencies just like this.

"Jack, you shouldn't have done something so rash," she scolded as she sat him down on a chair nearby, "you could have gotten hurt even worse than this."

"I know…" he said dejectedly as Maddie started working on him.

Maddie stopped what she was doing, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I only scold you because I love you and don't want to see you hurt." She then returned to work on his injuries.

"At least we know the Fenton Ghost-nade works! You got rid of all of those things with a single one!" Jack exclaimed excitedly.

"And now we can keep the portal doors closed, now that we don't need to have the lab bathed in ecto-plasm to prevent our work from blowing up in our faces."

"Well said! Now, how about that fudge?"

Maddie shook her head and smiled. "Anything for you." She finished patching up Jack and put the medical supplies away. She then supported him as they walked towards the stairs and out of the Lab, never to be bothered by the Warriors of Uganda ever again.

THE END

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It's finally over! I can now spend my time writing something that isn't a meme based PoS! If you're here after reading all three chapters, I'm sorry for the low quality garbage that came from me, but I just couldn't find it in myself to care very much about this. In the end this just became more of a burden instead of a pleasure. But at least it's over now. Go check out one of my other stories, and see if my amateur writing style takes your fancy?

~Chao!


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